I know You’re Out There…

April 17, 2009

I am pretty new still to this whole blogging thing. I started it 2 months ago. Since then, I have facebook, itunes, youtube, myspace, and a couple other accounts–just can’t think of them. I created the myspace but never use it. I needed the youtube to be able to upload videos to my blog. I have a new iphone and needed the itunes and I have not yet used it for music downloads because I am just too thrilled with all the applications I can download. My son loves the phone too and will beg to play games in the car when we are driving somewhere. He must let me play his gameboy in exchange, though. LOL. I do have a facebook account but thought really since this blog is so out there to the world, I would keep my FB more private and personal.

I am beginning to rethink this–to a point. I love that I have reconnected with some people I haven’t seen in almost a generation–geez that makes me sound old. I am just getting the hang of it and my original intent was the hope that my oldest daughter, Jasmine, would friend me. Maybe I could peek in on her life and she would let me. Maybe I could see who she’s hanging out with and what she’s up to. It took her two weeks to friend me. I’m surprised she even did. I was more surprised by what I saw on her wall and many of the pictures. Facebook and other social networking sites including instant messaging had always been forbidden in my home. Jasmine had friends who would sleep over and as long as Jasmine wasn’t herself doing it, she would allow her friends to do it (that way she could argue that she didn’t do it). Downloading some of the stuff on older computers crashed them or rendered them useless as many of the share ware stuff would contain viruses. It became necessary to put a password on the computer and until this past February–so it remained. It never dawned on me that my children were creating these accounts at the library, on sleepovers, and in their school’s computer lab. I guess they’d had these accounts for years unbeknownst to me–until I caught them. Demanding them to shut down their site proved useless since they could just spend the night at a friend’s house and they’d create a new one.

Then I took a vacation over the holidays. Two of my aunts had accounts and kept saying how fun it was and that I should do it. I thought about it for two months. Then I decided, if I couldn’t beat my kids at this game, I’d join them–and learn a little about their lives in the process. I’m not so sure anymore I should have done that. I’m mostly disturbed at the content and how these kids talk to each other, the personal information they share (even though they have all been taught not to advertise that stuff–for their own safety), and the nature of photos. These kids are completely clueless that what they post–in images or language–can come back to haunt them and their future professional endeavors. I can’t tell you how many times I have sat poised with my hands about to strike the keys in disgust at something I’ve read. I am worried, however, that if I use that wall to express my indignation at certain subjects or people that I will be unfriended by my own children. Then, I won’t even have those glimpses into their lives. I don’t know where, or who my oldest daughter is or is hanging out with, but I get little snippits of her life that feed through the live feed. At least I know she’s alive.

Anyway–enough with the digression–I have found that people are finding me! People I went to school with–high school or college, people that are in my life now, and I gotta tell ya…I think its pretty fun. I admit it. I see what the draw for my kids was. I also signed up for something on there called Networked Blogs. It feeds my blog into my facebook account. I’m not sure how it works from a reader’s end–if you have to do a search of Network Blogs and then once there become a fan of it or something–got me. I don’t know if you have to actually be friended by me to follow my blog. I don’t know if you can just search for Specifically Speaking and subscribe to the blog there and if that’s any different than subscribing to the blog here. I don’t know if on either this site or through FB if you are notified of new posts and how that all works.

What I do know is this, I have a friend who is listed in my sidebar. Her blog is through Blogger. I toyed with the idea of using that instead of WordPress, but decided on this one–just because I had absolutely no previous knowledge whatsoever between the two and which one had what features. Looking at my friend Katie’s blog, she has a widget tool that allows her to actually SEE who is commenting or following her blog. I LOVE THAT! I’m pretty visual and I just thought that was the coolest thing. So, one day this week, during naptime, I researched and downloaded and read tutorials on how to install this cool Google Friend Connect tool. Turns out–Wordpress doesn’t support it because it is written in javascript.

I have absolutely no idea what that means–some sort of code or something. I went into my dashboard, here on my site, and looked for something–anything–that would do the same thing, or at least see if anyone was following my blog. I couldn’t find anything. The only thing that gives me glimpses into who is following me is my site meter which can track by location and duration, but it doesn’t tell me SPECIFICALLY who? I talked to my friend, Tracy, who also has a blog on my sidebar, and got me going with mine and she says she follows a bunch of blogs without necessarily subscribing. That makes sense. Most people love to peek in on other’s lives without leaving so much as a footprint to let someone know they were there. They aren’t as inclined to comment or get involved, but they can’t stand to miss the latest post. I guess, I do that from time to time, now, also. I don’t always comment–when I would love to do that all the time.

I wonder if its like facebook–if you comment–are you risking poking your nose into someone else’s business for all to see. Some would rather just sit in the quiet of their own lives and read about other’s. Some become moved to write, comment, extend a salutation of some sort. I can’t help but wonder, though, who these individuals are that live in these locations my site meter tracks over and over. I know you’re out there, but do I know who you are? I can tell right away who some individuals are just by location around the world. I know when Colorado Springs shows up its my Aunt Ginny and when Charlottesville, Virginia comes across its my Aunt Pam. I know when my relatives overseas in Belgium come on. I even know when people from my hometown come in for a peak–but I don’t know who. I’m so curious to know, though.

So, with all that being said, if you have a facebook out there and want to subscribe to my blog and be so kind as to leave a rating or an image–try. I don’t know how you would need to do it from your end, but at least there, I can receive your profile pic that tells me who is following. I guess let me know if it doesn’t work. I just can’t help but think–in two months over 3600 people have clicked on my site. That just astonishes me. It’s the running question in my house when I do post–”how many clicks did you get today mom and where did they come from?” We like to see, and guess about who is showing up from St. Petersburg, Russia; Vantaa, Finland; Jakarta, Indonesia; London; Manchester, UK; Sydney, Australia; etc. I think that is so super cool. So cool, in fact, that I have it feed into my iphone!

When I think that maybe my story might prompt someone out there to feel touched and leave a comment, make an appointment for a mammogram, or just read quietly and then possibly say a prayer for my family–well, then, I guess I’ve affected some sort of change in this world. If I never hear from you SPECIFICALLY–that’s ok too. But…I know you’re out there!